It’s that special day again! And you know what? You…

Things you shouldn’t do today unless you’re a baddie

  1. Don’t let a black cat cross your path. It’s just bad luck, man…
  2. Don’t go camping. If you do, be polite and leave a goodbye letter.
  3. Don’t take a row boat into the middle of a lake.
  4. Don’t be a camp counselor. Quit, or at least take the day off. Just don’t go to work.
  5. Don’t split up. Unless you’re with the hot cheerleader. She’s definitely next.
  6. Don’t say, “It’s OK, I’m just gonna take a look around.”
  7. Don’t have sex. You’re definitely gonna be punished.
  8. Don’t get high, unless it’s your first time and you’re trying to fit in. You might get a mulligan.
  9. Don’t run. On Friday the 13th, walking is much faster than running. It’s simple physics.
  10. Don’t talk smack to anyone wearing a mask.
  11. Don’t be a jock. Or a jerk. Or a jock’s, or jerk’s, girlfriend.
  12. Don’t go looking to find that noise in the woods. Just leave.
  13. Don’t go to sleep. Or wait. Is that Nightmare on Elm Street?

You might be OK playing a little Bloody Mary or trying a few sleepover games like Light as a Feather. Those superstitions usually give way to the GOAT.

When is the next Friday the 13th?

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